Is it Love or Infatuation?

Back on December 1, 1990 I cut the following Ann Landers column out of the paper and put it on my refrigerator. Mind you I would not meet Steve for 4 more years. It is still on my refrigerator today. I don't know if I've ever shared this on my blog or not, but I thought about it the other day and know it's worthy of posting again:

Essay's Message still as relevant as ever:

Dear Ann Landers: Last weekend while going through some family photos, I found this old column. The message is as relevant as it was 15 years ago.

These days, when divorce is commonplace and teen-age pregnancy at an all-time high, people need tangible guidelines. Please reprint this column.

Here is Ann's Reply: The essay you've asked me to rerun is one of the most frequently requested. I'm pleased to publish it again. Thanks for asking. Is it Love or Infatuation?

Infatuation is instant desire - one set of glands calling to another.

Love is friendship that has caught fire. It takes root and grows, one day at a time.

Infatuation is marked by a feeling of insecurity. You are excited and eager but not genuinely happy. There are nagging doubts, unanswered questions, little bits and pieces about your beloved that you would just as soon not examine too closely. It might spoil the dream.

Love is the quiet understanding and mature acceptance of imperfection. It is real. It give you strength and grows beyond you - to bolster your beloved. You are warmed by his/her presence, even when he/she is away. Miles do not separate you. You want him/her near. But near or far, you know he/she is yours and you can wait.

Infatuations says, "We must get married right away. I can't risk losing him". Love says "Be patient. He/she is yours. Plan your future with confidence".

Infatuation has an element of sexual excitement. Whenever you are in one's another's company you are hoping it will end in intimacy. Love is the maturation of friendship. You must be friends before you are lovers (here I would add and married).

Infatuation lacks confidence. When he's away, you wonder if he's cheating. Sometimes you check.

Love means trust. You are calm, secure and unthreatened. He feels your trust and it makes him even more trustworthy. Infatuation might lead you to do things you'll regret later, but love never will.

Love lifts you up. It makes you look up. It makes you think up. It makes you a better person then you were before.

~

The only thing I would add to this is that he or she must be a follower of Christ. You must keep him in the center of your relationship.

A "Merry Christmas" in July Party & Award

E-Mom over at Chrysalis is having a Christmas Party! Since coming back from some cold temps out west this just feels right. She has several things to check out so head on over and have some fun! One thing that blew me away is she gave me an award!! Now I haven't been blogging regularly in quite a while, and E-mom is one of my faithful commenters. Not only that but I have been so blessed by her teachings over at Chrysalis, so me getting an award from her is ~ well a big deal! Thanks E-mom! Here is my award:

Here are the rules attached to this award:

1. Thank the person who gave you this award.

2. Share 7 things about yourself.

3. Pass the award along to 15 bloggers who you have recently discovered and who you think are fantastic!

4. Contact the bloggers you’ve picked and let them know about the award.

So I am supposed to share 7 things about myself. WoW do they have to be interesting? I don't know if I have 7 things to share that would peak someones interests, hummm....... let's try:

1. I can read while traveling. I know many people, my daughter and mother included who get car sick if they read. I so appreciate the fact I can read while riding. It helps the time pass.
2. I have been told I have Indian as part of my ancestry. You can see it in my mom and a few sisters, but it appears if that is true, the only thing I received from it is my bone straight hair. Some day I would like to research this to see if it indeed is true or legend. On our recent trip though I asked the kids who this old Indian woman looked like in a picture and they both said "grandma".
3. When in a museum I cannot stand and read all the information near exhibits. I'm more a visual person. My husband on the other hand can spend hours doing it. So I wait alot at the the end of exhibits for him. Good thing I have a book to read!
4. When I was younger my hair was so blonde someone asked if I bleached it. I was in 6th grade. Do mothers let their 6th graders bleach their hair? I know mine wouldn't!!!
5. I used to collect tea cups. I have them all boxed up downstairs in storage, because we have not place for them to display. My favorite cup came from my sister Kam and her husband Jeff. It belonged to his grandparents. It has 22 carat gold trim on it. It's dainty and beautiful! The largest part of the collection came from my Grandma Olsen through my mother.
   
6. I was once in a television commercial. It was very short lived and was for the insurance company I worked for. I didn't think anyone would see it, but my sister told me she was watching T.V. and there I was. It didn't air very long.
7. Speaking of insurance. That is what I did before I became a mom. I was an underwriter at Lake States Insurance Company, based out of Traverse City Michigan. I had been in insurance for quite a few years. My favorite job though was being a Commercial Lines Rater (they are the ones who calculate the premiums on policies). I am a numbers person, and this job dealt in that. I miss it actually. Don't know if I could do it again or not, very rusty!

Well there you have it. 7 things you may not have known.

I am also supposed to give this to 15 new blogs I have gone to, but I haven't been stepping out lately to new blogs. Just my tried and true! There is one I have gone to that I love, but she has received the award from E-mom too. It's Stones of Remembrance! Can you see why went to her blog in the first place? Her posts have blessed my heart!