Friday, April 24, 2009

Easier said then done!

Matthew 6: 33-34
33But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

I know the truth "Do not worry". I tell others the truth "Do not worry". I know it in my head "Do not worry", but alas here I am "worrying", fretting, thinking of the worst!

When it comes to my children, sometimes I feel so powerless (I know I'm not powerless, but I feel that way). Our oldest struggles with many issues. We think we are going along fine and helping him overcome, but so often we feel that we are getting now where. He is very anxious about performing period. If it is ever so slightly difficult for him, he backs out. We try to talk to him and feel like he doesn't listen. I pray with him and tell him to go to God when he feels this way and God will give him the strength to endure (Here is one of these things I should be listening to myself!) I WORRY! What does the future hold for him? Will he be O.K.? My husband has even said "where did we go wrong?", "where did we fail him?" I so want to trust that everything will be O.K., but we are not guaranteed that. God didn't say everything would turn out rosy, he did say "he has a plan". How do I give that speech to my children if I can't walk the walk myself? Are they seeing through the mask of my lack of faith, and is it effecting them?

Oh the thoughts that go through my head!!! Another thing that is effecting him and so many kids today is BULLYING! I just read on the news this morning a 5th grader committed suicide because of bullying! 5TH GRADE!!! How do we stop this from happening? I know that Jeremiah is bullied often, and I feel powerless (again) to help him. I have wanted to offer my services to school to monitor the halls, but Jeremiah said that would make it worst for him. Why are children today so mean?! How do you protect your children and help them through without taking the road of this 5th grader? His mother even went to the school. It didn't help!

I don't know what I'm looking for: advice, prayer, wisdom, a good kick in the pants for my lack of faith? You name it, I'll take it! Thanks for letting me vent! I have a great kid! He is really wonderful! I just wish he could see that too!


Diane said...

I feel for you so much Kim! You know some of the things we've gone through with Logan and what an emotional roller coaster we've had too. I know we've already talked so much about this subject and I'm willing to talk as much as you would like about it... I just don't know how much help I can offer other than a listening ear and an understanding heart.

One thing I was thinking about while reading this post is - does he know your struggle with your faith? yes, you are the mom but you're not infallible and you're not perfect. what is he comparing himself to? maybe he continues to be so hard on himself because he thinks he's the only one who doesn't have it all together.

As far as bullying goes... I just don't know what to tell you about that. Logan was much bigger than Miah is and at least Logan had weight to help fend off bullies. Is it on the bus he gets bullied? Is it in class, in the hallways, etc.? Yes to all?? This really saddens me to see that a school can't make the kids feel safe! Keep at them to fix this problem. It's a big issue and should have more done about it.

Hang in there hon! As my Dad always told me... "This too shall pass"... Jeremiah will be just what God intends for him to be because he has the love and guidance from the 2 people that God felt were the best for him!

Beth in NC said...

I wish I had wisdom to share. My daughter hasn't started school yet.

I pray there are some Mom's out there who can share from experience.

Poor little fellow. I know it concerns you.


Cheri said...

Oh Kim,
This makes my heart hurt. I don't think there's much worse than having your kids hurting and not knowing how or if you can help.
I wish I had something to say that would be really helpful but there aren't any easy answers are there!
I think Diane is right though. I think as parents we sometimes don't let our struggles be known to the kids and I think it's such a learning opportunity for them to know we don't have it all together all the time either. Praying for you, your family and that horribly sad situation with that 5th grader.

Mari said...

It's so hard as a parent to see you child hurt in any way. You do want to get right into it and yell at those other kids, but like Jeremiah said, it would probably make things worse. I think you need to keep showing him your love and support. He knows that home is a safe place and a place where he is loved. Give him advice when needed and maybe you need to talk to the school.
One thing I have seen with my kids, is that many of the kids who were really popular or were the bullies don't seem to make much of their lives when they are out of school. Jeremiah is so smart and I really think he will go far. It probably doesn't help him now because it seems like such a long time away, but I think when he is older, many of them will be jealous of him.
And of course there is prayer. I know you pray for him and it's the most important thing you can do. I'll be praying for him too.

e-Mom said...

We all struggle with doubt, don't we? I find I MUST be in the Word each and every day, to overcome my worries. I just can't go without a daily feeding of his Truth. Man shall not live on bread alone...

Have a blessed weekend, Kim. :~D

Denise said...

You will be in my prayers. I love you.

Leigh Anne said...

We can't help but worry about our children. What kind of parents would we be? God knows our pain, he experienced it at the cross. Praying with your son will give him hope even if he doen't express it to you. Blessings.

Lorrie said...

I don't know how old your son is...but I KNOW ALL about a boy who doesn't fit in the round mold who is bullied. Praise God my son is over most of that now and we have a bit of a break in his school life. I have stuff from UCLA (a class we took) and they dealt with bullying. It's something you can teach your son and if you want the info...I can always post it on my blog. My regular blog is I'll pray for you and him too. Blessings.